What is love?

A lot is being said lately on the subject of love, so I thought I'd throw my hat into the ring on this one. For those of you who don't know, Maggie is really, really in love. She has been dating the man of her soul for about two months now, and some people think that being in love after two months is to soon. I myself think that they are each lucky to have found something so wonderful in the other. I would like to look at this issue from a couple different viewpoints.

First, as someone who takes psychology classes for fun. In psych, there is something called the four myths of love: 1) When you fall in love, you'll know it, 2) When love strikes, you have no control over it, 3) True love lasts forever, and 4) Love can conquer all problems. I'd like to pay attention to numbers 1 and 2. Not everyone who falls in love knows it. Sometimes it creeps up on you and taps you on the shoulder, and other times it walks up to you, slaps you across the face and says "hey!" People can go for long periods of time without ever knowing they are in love. Related to that statement is number 2. You do have control over things when you fall in love. Some people behave in the most irrational ways when they think that they love someone. You need to sit down and look at what you are feeling and decide if it's just infatuation/lust or if it really is love. From this p.o.v, two months seems like a bit fast to be in love.

Next, from the view of a poet. As a poet, I write a lot about the subject of love. It's not really that I want to, it's just something that happens. For most writers, love has this odd, other-wordly quality that needs to be expressed through written words. Many of the words used to describe this emotion give an image of light, flowing, everlasting beauty. Things like water and light are used to symbolize the coming together of elements, since both combine with others rather easily. Poetry tends to emphasize the romantic, everlasting idea of love. A lot of it puts love on a pedestal, something to be admired and sought by everyone. Love, in this context, is something that you fall into. Love is also something that you can fall out of. It is like a dawning and a drowning at the same time, being peaceful, painful, sweet and sour all at once. A broken arm followed by kisses to ease the pain. According to this p.o.v, love at first sight is possible.

Lastly, from my point of view. I've been hurt by love, and it's a deep scar that's still healing, although it's almost gone. Everyone has love inside of them, at least on some level. With some, it's deep inside, and with others, it's out in the open for all to see. Since people have it in them, it only needs to brought out by someone, or something else. When two people bring out the love in each other, it's one of the greatest things there is. If you are lucky enough to find your soul mate, then you are truly blessed. It is human nature to love, although some people may not believe it. Love is something that flows through people like water, and when shared between two people, makes them closer. I think that, as long as you are rational enough to separate infatuation from love, you can fall in love after a couple of days. It took me a while to fall in love that first time, but it was worth it while it lasted. Looking back on it, I'm not really sure if it was love as most people would define it, but I know it wasn't infatuation. I know Maggie well enough to know that she wouldn't say she was in love unless she was (Maggie is very rational). For me, two months is not to soon to fall in love. Be happy you've found someone and cherish everyday you have with them.

Now, having tackled this serious topic, I'd like to end on a lighter note.


Saturday night at Sally Bees:

Me: What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object?

Pat: I have no idea.

Me: It creates a rip in the fabric of time, which in turn spawns a black whole............. and kills a puppy.

Pat: What!?

The complexities of waffles.

I am totally awesome at psychology! Got another perfect score on my psych test. I'd say I'm psyched, but that's just such an obviously bad joke that I'm not even gonna go there. I can believe that in a little over a month I'll be graduating with my two year degree. In other good news, I've been invited to the Honors Reception at the college. I have no idea what's going to happen there, but I know that I have to dress up. Yes, this may mean that I have to go out and by a dressy skirt of some sort. Not that I don't own skirts, it's just that none of them are suitable for this kind of thing.

Thursday night was a lot of fun. A little while after I got to bootleggers, I ran into Trent, Dan, and Brian. We hung out for a while before I saw Zmudge and Marie on the dance floor. Pretty much everyone else was next door hanging out. I bounced back and forth between rooms for a while, then Mike got kicked out for god knows what reason. Shortly after that happened, everyone else left for the night. I went over to Frogtown Jonnys with Trent, Dan, and Brian for a bit until they closed around 2 am. Since we were hungry, we went over to Waffle House for some food type stuff. You really shouldn't go to a Waffle House when you want pancakes, it's really not a good idea. Anyway, we had some food and ran into a rather drunk Vinnie. All in all, it was a good night, mostly because I didn't have to get up for anything on Friday so I wasn't worrying about how much sleep I would get.


Brian at Bootleggers:

Seriously, every time you go out you should order a "Red-headed Slut". It's just so damn funny!

Been a while...

So hey y'all! I know it's been a while and I'm sorry for that. No you're right Amanda, we don't hang out often enough but this will change... cuz I'm taking the summer off! (from classes, not from work sadly... god that'd be nice!) I also scheduled three weeks of vacation for this summer. That's where they pay you to be on the beach, for those of you without this particular employment benefit. I really can't wait!

Also I'm gonna go and live in a house come August. This should be a great move up in the world from a "studio" apartment. Don't get me wrong, I love my apartment but a house is... well... bigger! Bruce get on it and move out with us!

Long story short, I'm in love to the sideways eight. I can't believe how awesome this is! It makes every thing better/brighter and all that other crap I used to never believe in... I am in such a fuckin great mood all the time (except for 7am... but can ya blame me?) For those of you who are the dude I'm in love with-Thank You for finding me! For those of you who aren't him... Go make some girl happy!

Almost forgot.....

I almost forgot to post my poem for this month, so here it is. Enjoy!

My Mothers Garden

Sunlight filters along the leaves
Making them all shades of fall
Jewel-tone
Yellow green
Scarlet and brown
Splashing across my face
As I wander through my mind
In search of my mothers garden

Laying on my back
On a quilt she made me
Years ago
Composed of every color
Except pink
Tracing patterns with my fingers
As I remember her
My mother in her garden

Plants of different colors green
She tends to them
Like she tends to us
I used to watch her for hours
Now I wish I could go back
To the simpler days
When all I had to was go
In search of my mothers garden

Bet you didn't see this one coming

Guess what today is! Come on, just guess. What? You got nothing? Ok then, it's the spring equinox! From now on the suns direct rays will be moving north and it will be getting warmer. I'm so excited, I can't wait for the warm weather. I'm so damn tired of being cold and dealing with mass amounts of precipitation, and I really think I need to get some sun. Even my normally human colored spots are starting to look a bit undead in shade. Ah well, all I have to do now is wait.

St. Patty's day was awesome. I went to see Constantine with Maggie, Clara, Jen, John, and Jason before we went out to party for the evening. After the movie (which was pretty good) Maggie, Jason, and I went down to The Village Idiot. Started out the night with an Irish Car Bomb twice the size of the one Norton had at Frickers for about half the price. Had a couple of beers and a snakebite and called it a night. I know, I know, I'm a lightweight. Whatever, just because I don't drink a lot doesn't mean that I can't hold my alcohol. Because I can............. very well. We called Jen for a ride because none of us were going to drive home, and we crashed at Maggies place. All in all, it was a really good night. I really don't hang out with Maggie enough, and besides, we're more awesome then normal when we've had a few.

Bootleggers is in the books for Thursday. I'm not going to say that I plan to be there because every time I do, things get fuckered up and I don't go. In the mean time, if anybody wants to check out one of the most awesome things ever, just click here!

See everybody later this week.

Best weekend ever!!!

Oh my god! I just had one of the most awesome weekends ever! Seriously, the weekend (saturday to sunday morning mostly) was one of the best I've had in a while. I started out the day by going to my yoga class. I've really missed working out, and yoga is just so much FUN! Anyway, after that, I went to work at the Manor House and ran into some people I hadn't seen in a while. Next on the agenda was work at Ciao. Not bad, kind of a slow night, but not bad. The real fun began when I got off work and went out for Toms B-day. We started out at El Matidor, had some fun, went over to Miss Cue, had some drinks. Tom got pretty drunk while we were at Miss Cue, it was really sweet to just watch these guys. They're funny when their not drunk, so it gets wild when you get some drinks in 'em. Anyway, after Miss Cue we went over to Amanda's (not me, other Amanda) Aunts house for some more drinks and some beer pong. We ended up not playing beer pong, but there was a lot of other fun stuff, like poker. I love poker. Poker is one of the greatest card games I've ever played. We stayed up until about 6 am and I got home and in bed around 6:30 am. I got about 3 1/2 hours of sleep only to get up and go to work at the Manor House again on Sunday. I'm still laughing and smiling about stuff that happened. Hehehehehe.........

So yeah, one of the best weekends ever. Definetly in the top five. See you guys tomorrow, first it's Buffy night, then on to Frickers! Weeeeeeeeeee.......

Hi

Amanda, god damnit, we totally went to Bootleggers on Thursday, every time we go, you don't, and when we don't, you go. One of these times we have to go. But anyways, about tonight, I shall give your telephone a call, we don't know where we're going yet tonight, we might go to miss cue. There will also be much fighting tonight.

Shortest post ever

Still sick, didn't go to Bootleggers. Work sucks, school sucks, I need to get me some more sleep. Maggie, we totally need to set up some girl time so we can talk and just hang out. Mike, I'll see you guys Saturday for Toms birthday because I WILL be better, damn it. If I have work at Ciao! I'll turn my cell off so you can just leave a messege and I don't have to worry about some random guy answering it.


42 is the answer to everything.

Deus Ex Machina (god from the machine)

Somehow I've managed to get sick again. Don' t ask me how this keeps happening, but it does, and it sucks, big time. I totally missed class this morning because I couldn't get up, and I don't just mean wake up, I really couldn't sit up in bed and move. I will be better by tomorrow though, I fully plan on going to Bootleggers as long as other people are going too. I think my body just needs more sleep and a lot of fluids before I go to work tonight.

I'm back in school from spring break, which sucked because everybody I hang out with has break a week after I do. That will all change next year though, just you watch. I'm doing all right in all my classes, but Modern Social Problems is sucking ass big time. Yesterday we got our midterms back and we were told that a third of the class if failing. A whole third of the class! That's really, really bad (I'm not among that third btw). As we're going over the test, students are picking out questions that we have doubts about because of the answers, and the teacher is all "I can see how that's confusing", or "You're right, the text does say that's the answer" but she's not changing the scores. I could've ended up with a different and better grade if she had been changing them. As a compromise, as she called it, she offered us an extra credit project. The project? Go see "Hotel Rowanda" and write a 5 page paper on it in relation to what we've learned and what we think the problems presented in the movie are. Since the movie isn't out on video we have to go see it in theaters and pay for it. And even if we do see the movie, we only get 15 percentage points (not that we know whet that means anyway, none of know how she's grading these things) for doing the project, we don't get any points for going out of our way and paying to see the movie. The only theater it's playing at is all the way out on airport highway, which is like 30 min. away from my house. The paper also has to be "well written". If she has any problems with the composition, grammar, or content, she said she will start slashing points like she cutting weeds. I can't wait until the quarter is over and I can fill out her evaluation.

More fun news, my mom thinks I have a drinking problem. I can totally see why she would think that, seeing as how I come home every time I go out with friends, I keep up with my schoolwork, I get to all of my jobs on time and pick up extra hours, do my work around the house, don't keep any alcohol in the house, have only been drunk twice ever, and have never had a DUI or any other alcohol related problem ( except for a couple of hangovers). What else can I do? I've proven that I'm a level headed, responsible, mature young adult. I guess the only thing I can do is to continue what I'm doing and hope that she sees how wrong she is. It hurts that she heard one story about how I was drinking at a party and thinks that It's all I do when I go out.

Oh, and Mike, if you've gotten to this point, give me a call about Toms birthday. I'll know Thursday if I have work Saturday night, and if I know where you guys are gonna be before hand, I'll join you there.

I promise that my next post will be lighter of subject and have more of the humor. Promise.

New Stuff, Old Stuff, and..... Odd Stuff?

Ok, so I woke up this morning and went to the grand opening of the new YMCA in Lambertville. Let me tell you, that place is friggin' AWESOME!!!!!!! I've been waiting for it to open for about a year, and I was not disappointed. One of the first things you see when you walk in is a rock climbing wall. A rock climbing wall!!!!!!! Is that not sweet? I think it's sweet. I know, I know "UT has a rock wall". Whatever. This is a first for me and I think it's great, even though it's not a new thing for the area. They also have a separate play and lap swimming pools, so if I'm trying to do laps I won't have to worry about little kids swimming into my lane. In the gym, area, they have all new equipment (including some new machines I've never seen before) and a great free weights area. I signed up for yoga classes twice a week, so I'm happy about starting them on Tuesday. I plan to be very flexi when I'm done with them.

Bootleggers on Thursday night was cool. It was kinda slow and not as crowed as usual because of spring break. We called it a night around 12:30 because people were getting tired and stuff. I still plan on going next week, but I'll be back in school seeing as how my spring break was this week. Mike, it's ok that you didn't come, but next time I think I'm gonna have to knock you out and drag you over to make sure that you're there. Well, I wouldn't really knock you out, I don't think I can muster up the force to do so. Besides, if you ended up with a big lump on your head, you might not feel much like partying. I can make you feel really really bad about not showing up though. I do have talent in that arena. Muwaaahahahaha................. (grin)

Also Mike, I want to thank you for offering to beat up the ponce who e-mailed me the dumbest fucking question ever. If the little punk ever does so again, I will tell him that you will fight anybody. I myself will be forced to open up a plethura of cans, all of which will contain some whoop ass.



I'm tired of trying to be what I'm not. I should first figure out who I am.

Hey fellas

Alright, here's the deal, we didn't make it out to Bootleggers last night, sorry, but we're now officially on spring break, so we will be there next week, it will be awesome. Maggie, I'm sorry your birthday wasn't fun, but atleast you got DVD's. Anyways, Amanda, if that guy who e-mailed you gives you anymore problems, tell him I will fight anyone. Dude, I got the night off work tonight because it's Friday, and it's the start of spring break, so why not? I'm prolly gonna get shitty tonight.

Why is it any of your business?

So I got this e-mail from someone who's been reading the blog. Good news because someone that I don't know was interested enough to read the archives, bad because of the content. The e-mail asked me why I was so against love and relationships. Let me clarify this for you. I am not against love, relationships, or dating. It's just that the relationships I've had have been less than helpful in creating warm, fuzzy feelings for guys I'm in relationships with, or any romantic relationships in the future. I will date people and have relationships, as well as friendships with guys, but I don't think love is very high on my priority list right now. I hope that that answers all of your questions cuddlebug413.

22 and kicking...

Well as usual, my birth day was not awesome. It's not something I consistently bitch about, more an annoying pain in the butt kinda thing. It's something I just accept as part of my idosyncratic life. ($5.00 word!) However, I did get some awsome presents! Amanda, thank you so much for the Sake Set... can't wait to Kombai! with ya! Also I received a total of 19 DVD's to bring my collection to a burgening begining. Thanks all who contributed and, uh... HELL yeah Bootleggers tonight! We gon go around 10:30... see you with bells on all!

Bootleggers!

Alright ladies and gentelmen, Bootleggers is on for Thursday! Since I didn't go last week, I'm really looking forward to tomorrow. As an added bonus, I somehow managed to get all of Friday off from all jobs! Marvelous! Spring break is almost over, which I'm gald for just because I'll have to get back on schedule. I think I'm going to take up lap swimming when I get back to class. I've always liked swimming, so maybe this will work better that my going to the gym. Also, swimming is just plain Fun!

Everybody who's coming to Bootleggers, I'll see you there!

It's the Birthday Bird!

This will be a short post, just updating really quick.

First of all, I want to wish Maggie a happy 22nd birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!! it's about 20 min. to early, but it still works. I'm sorry that we have to postpone Buffy night, but I know we'll do it sometime this week.

Second, spring break is a cute idea until I realize just how little I do other then work and school. If anyone wont's to hang out this week, give me a call. I'm up for just about anything. Why? Because if I don't have work, I'm board out of my mind! My Mind!!!!!!